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NHL Playoff Observations -- Conference Finals Begin

Just a few things that caught my eye ...

  • Irritable bowel disease, fibromyalgia and center-line goals -- everything has a support group these days. Don't worry, Jonathan Quick -- Tommy Salo or Dan Cloutier will text with the time and date of the next meeting. 
  • I was wrong -- T.J. Oshie is just the baby honey badger. The original nastya$$ honey badger? Dale Hunter. He REALLY don't give a @#$|PERCENT|. He ripped the head off that cobra named Alexander Ovechkin. Crazy $|PERCENT|&!. Then what did honey badger Hunter do? Quit ... on his own terms to head back to the farm. Honey badger might be a bada$$, but honey badger sure is smart. Besides, honey badger needs to get his soybeans into the ground. And his London Knights to the Mem Cup.
  • B-bye, Alexander Semin. He says he won't be back to the Caps, the team that proved they didn't need him this season any way. Any team that signs him is nuts. Let me re-phrase that -- any team in the NHL that signs him is nuts.
  • The rumors that dog Patrick Kane just keep getting louder and louder. These frat-boy antics would have been hidden in the past, but not anymore, what with that social media and interweb stuff. Proof positive you don't need brains to be alive. But you probably do need a team-assigned handler or two.
  • 18-21-2. What's that, you ask? The kind of win-loss record that earns you a new, two-year contract in Columbus. Then again, they had to talk Todd Richards into taking it. Guess he drew the short straw ...
  • The Coyotes have finally discovered that rope-a-dope hockey can only go so far. Mind you, they didn't exactly counter punch on Saturday night. They just took a beating. 
  • The American Automobile Association says running on empty -- or worse, running out of gas -- can lead to costly problems down the road. I wonder what they say about the Rangers. They got away with one tonight.
  • No one answered me the last time I asked why Dustin Brown was on the trade market earlier this year. Should I ask again? 'Cuz I still don't get it. Stud.